Episode 94 - T is for Touch
In order to S.O.F.T.E.N. people who are resisting you, it’s smart to remember the T is for touch. Human touch is basic for bonding, even in business.
I learned this many years ago when I was selling real estate. I met a family of 5 in the office. I shook hands with the mother, father, and 2 children. But when I extended my hand to Grandma, she looked down and took a tiny step backward. The subtle message to me was: “don’t touch the old lady.” Fine. We piled into my car and spent the next few hours exploring houses. As it got dark we found a perfect one – right size, right price, right condition, right schools, right everything. Being late, we agreed to get together in the morning to do business. But the next morning the mother called to say they couldn’t buy the house because Grandma didn’t approve.
Now Grandma hadn’t said anything negative in the car. Actually, she hadn’t said anything! We had laughed, joked, swapped stories, and gotten excited in the car – all except Grandma. She didn’t participate. Now, guess who had the down payment money? Guess who was the real decision maker? Grandma!
What did I learn from this? The failure to connect at the start with a touch could signal there are hidden issues and it would be smart to spend more time in the office talking about what is to be accomplished and less time flailing around for solutions.
Touch is important for bonding, even in business.